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Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Confused...

It’s 10:00 am and I get a call from my dad’s friend. Her daughter just cleared her 12th grade and gave the entrance exam for medical studies. I being one already trapped in the bait of syringes, needles and dentures, she most readily calls me for advice. What do I tell her? That I am happy here? In a college and profession where you kill to survive, betray your friends, spend your parent’s hard earned money recklessly. Yes it’s true. Not that I am unsuccessful but deep down inside I regret… regret not having given a thought to what I really desire. I am in a profession which I don’t really hate but don’t really love either. Then why am I here?... because it seemed to be the natural choice. But deep down inside my heart wanted me to do something else. But the mighty confused mind took control and things changed. I have accepted the change and learnt to be happy about it. But should I watch others falling into the same trap?

This girl says she’s really passionate about being a doctor. I don’t know how much truth that holds, because some years back even I was very ‘passionate’ about it. She says she’s ready to wait for one more year and repeat the entrance exam…just because her friends are doing the same. What does it indicate? A clear and focused mind or a confused one?

Her mom agrees to her decision. Without giving it any thought. She wants her daughter to be happy even if it means spending more money and seeing her daughter sit at home for a year, and I can’t really blame her. Her daughter is pushing herself into a pit of which she has no idea. I want to speak to her. I want to pour my heart out to her. But I don’t know how she is going to judge my intentions. If she is really passionate about it then to hell with everything else. I am with her. But if she is confused, like I was some years back, then I feel for her. I don’t want her to end up like me. I hope she speaks her mind out to me once. I hope I can help the confused minds of this country to really think from their heart. Know what they really want before attempting something silly and regretting it later. I wish to help... and that’s my only intention!!!

7 comments:

Rohan said...

Fantastic,I m in the same pit you are in and right now but the difference is you are accepting it and i m gettin out of it for what i really want to do.

Dont let the girl fall into what you have fallen into.Giver her a clear picture and let her decide :)

Mona said...

i wish i could do that... but she isn't willing to talk to me... if she does i ll surely give her a clear picture.. hoping for the best!!

mitra said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Rajesh said...

Very nice...i could see COUNTLESS EMOTIONS pouring into this write-up. Even I've had similar experience with my cousins...they wanna do Engineering and I shud help them out...my attitude towards engg s much similar to urs towards medicine..nice read...keep writing

Venky said...

You have done your best my dear but if the other person is adamant you have to leave him or her have his own way. You have tried to go out of the way to help and convince her that she has better options still awaiting. Do your best and leave the rest to GOD. This is the only thing I would say. Love you a lot - Pappa

Anonymous said...

u know i hv faced the same situation. being medical student i myself have gone thru this bagful of confusions. i dropped my year for my entrance test . seriously evn nw aftr clearing it ....um not sure enough whethr um ready to give my 5-6 yrs to this profession .

ashwin said...

been there, done that ,same problems, same feeling ,

was hell bent on being a doc, gave cet twice, got thru , finished my mbbs, thn started thinking whether all is really worth it,

but........when i walk into a room , i touch a patient's wrist and feel his bounding pulse against my finger tips, and hear out his complaints, reach a diagnosis, treat him , and see the smile on his face....trust me ....i no more regret being a doctor